A cage is a cage, Jim. - McCoy
A calculated risk, Mr. Spock. - Kirk
A calm day turns gusty the moment you drop a œ20 note
A camel is a horse designed by a committee. - Anon
A camel is a horse designed by committee. A brontosaurus is a salamander designed to Mil-Spec
A camel is a horse planned by committee.
A camel is a horse put together by a committee.
A camel is actually a horse put together by Congress!
A camel looks like a horse planned by a committee. (Vogue Magazine)
A camel may pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased.
A camel trainer might drive a Caravan.
A camel, a dwarf and a contortionist went into a bar
A camel: A horse designed by a Republican committee
A camera thief wouldn't want to leave his prints. --W. Jim Sutton
A camping we will go, me and baby and bat make three
A camping we will go, me and baby and bat make three
A can of ASPARAGUS, 73 pigeons, some LIVE ammo, and a FROZEN DAQUIRI!!
A can of Crisco can outthink Rust Limberger.
A can of black eyed peas, some nes-cafe and ice
A can of worms full of Pandora's boxes.
A can short of a six pack.
A can shy of a six-(or twelve-)pack
A candidate is a person who gets money from the rich and votes from the poor to protect them from each other
A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
A candle on each nightstand, a bottle of wine, a fireplace... and you.
A candle that lights another does not lose anything.
A candour affected is a dagger concealed. - Marcus Aurelius
A candy a day gives the dentist his pay.
A canner can can anything he can; but a canner can't can a can, can he ?
A cannibal loved fast food so he ordered a pizza with everybody on it
A cannibal only opens his mouth to change your feet.
A cannibal uses a Blazing Saddle, hmmm?
A cannibal was expelled from school...He buttered up his teacher
A capite ad calem...From head to heel
A cappella...Midi sound on an XT
A captain hates reading manuals - they take his mind off himself
A captain is one who walks down Lovers' Lane holding his own hand
A captain never bounces unless the ship is out of rig or badly loaded
A capucino machine that also takes pictures - Joel
A car and woman are the same! NEEDS!!
A car boot? - Amelia Ducat
A car is just a big purse on wheels. - Johanna Reynolds
A car raising contest is a jack off
A car that starts when you have to go to work won't turn over on your day off. -- Doug Larson
A car tried to occupy the same spacetime as mine.
A car without a woofer is a car with a loser
A cardinal rule of politics: never get caught in bed with a live man or a dead woman. (J.R. Ewing)
A career is a job that has gone on too long.
A career is a job that takes about 20 more hours a week.
A career is great, but you can't run your fingers through its hair
A caribou by any other name is still a big 'ol hairy deer looking thing.
A carpenter varnished without a trace.
A cartrated hog says, ruint, ruint, ruint!
A case of beer and high explosives, sounds like a party
A cast of Alexander's forehead: the ridges of a warrior.
A castrated hog says, ruint, ruint, ruint!
A cat *will* blink when hit by a hammer.
A cat And in a strange turn of events, the cat was electrocuted.
A cat NEVER leaves the toilet seat up!
A cat WILL blink when hit with a hammer
A cat _WILL_ blink when hit by a hammer.
A cat a day keeps the blues away
A cat a day keeps the salmon away!
A cat a day will keep the Salmon away!!
A cat almost always blinks when hit in the head with a ball peen hammer
A cat always assumes the shape of its container.
A cat always land on it's feet - unless ya tie a brick round it's neck
A cat by any other name would still just sit and stare at you
A cat cannot be defined in a single word
A cat could be man's best friend, but never stoops to it.
A cat gets FLATTER the more you run over it!
A cat goes quack - if you squeeze it hard enough
A cat has 32 muscles in each ear
A cat has nine lives, a Trill can have many more
A cat has nine lives, how about you?
A cat has to have a name, or else it wouldn't be a cat.
A cat hit by a car: Mee--OOOOOWWWWWWW!
A cat in heat has elevated whore moan levels
A cat in heat has elevated whore moan levels!!! >EEEYYOOWWLL!!!< | -[
A cat in heat has elevated whore moan levels.
A cat in the tire treads will make a car run smoother. --SAE
A cat is _always_ on the wrong side of the door.
A cat is a cat, unless it's a dead cat, that is
A cat is a diagram and pattern of subtle air.
A cat is a four footed allergen.
A cat is a friend who will never betray you.
A cat is a terrible thing to waste, reheat the leftovers!
A cat is a terrible thing to waste. Drive safely
A cat is all love and energy!
A cat is always on the wrong side of a door.
A cat is always there for you!
A cat is an animal who never cries over spilled milk.
A cat is an extension of God.
A cat is domestic only as far as it suits its own ends.
A cat is easier to train than a Moderator
A cat is easier to train than a Moderator. <-er,... um,... <blush!>
A cat is easier to train than a Moderator... and usually better behaved
A cat is easier to train than a man
A cat is easier to train than a moderator.
A cat is easier to train than a woman
A cat is easier to understand than a woman
A cat is just a bundle of purr.
A cat is like to death, I'm saving up the Pelvic thrust.
A cat is man's best friend
A cat is nobody's fool.
A cat is only domestic so far as it suits its own needs. -Heinlein
A cat is only domestic so far as suits its own needs.
A cat is only domestic so far as suits its own needs. - Heinlein
A cat is the Universe's way of showing up purrfection
A cat is the only real love money can buy.
A cat is the universe's way of showing perfection
A cat is the visible soul of a home
A cat is, above all things, a dramatist.
A cat is, above all things, an ingredient of Chop Suey.
A cat itself is but a shadow. - Shakespeare
A cat knows all about you, and likes you anyhow
A cat looks not with the eyes but with the mind
A cat never cries over spilled milk
A cat pelt is nothing at all like a cat.
A cat sleeps fat, yet walks thin.
A cat still needs someone to be independent *of*
A cat stretches from one end of @F's childhood to the other.
A cat that isn't finicky....soon loses control of it's owner.
A cat that will let you strike it with a hammer deserves
A cat who isn't finicky soon loses control of her owner!
A cat will almost always blink when hit on the head with a hammer
A cat will almost always blink when hit with a hammer
A cat will almost always flinch when hit with a hammer. - Someone else
A cat will always sit on whatever it is you're trying to read or copy.
A cat will always sit on whatever you're trying to read
A cat will assume the shape of its container.
A cat will assume the shape of the container it is packed into.
A cat will be man's best friend but never stoops to it
A cat will blink if you hit it with a hammer.
A cat will blink when cut in half with a chainsaw
A cat will blink when struck on the head with a hammer.
A cat will blink when struck with a hammer.
A cat will blink when the freezer door is opened.
A cat will expand to fill the space available to it
A cat will go "QUACK!" if you squeeze it hard enough
A cat will go "quack!" if you squeeze it hard enough.
A cat with gloves on will catch no mice.
A cat with little ones has never a good mouthful.
A cat with no destination is never lost
A cat without a hair ball gland ... is only half a cat! --Ren
A cat would be man's best friend, but does not wish to stoop to it.
A cat would be man's best friend, but never stoops to it.
A cat's courage is as strong as a dog's chain
A cat's loyalty is confined to its food dish!
A cat's place is in control.
A cat's purr is the rumble of peace in the animal kingdom
A cat's purr is the sound of it generating cute.
A cat's purr is the sound of it sucking up to you
A cat's purr: Most effective stress medicine known.
A cat's tail will tell you more than you think!
A cat's worst enemy is a closed door.
A cat's worst nightmare is a closed door!
A cat, the only self -cleaning appliance in the house
A catch of aids
A cats purr is the sound of it generating "cute"
A cats way of keeping law & order is Claw Enforcement
A cats worst enemy is a closed door.
A cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education. -- Mark Twain
A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.
A cellular fossil? - Picard
A cemetery is the worst place to get stoned
A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks he ought to.- G Hicks
A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to. --Granville Hicks
A censor is someone who knows more than he thinks you should.
A censor is someone who knows more than he thinks you should.
A census taker once tried to test me. -- Hannibal Lector
A centipede is an ant made to Canadian specs.
A centipede is an ant made to government specifications
A centipede is an ant made to liberal Canadian specs
A centipede is an ant, made to government specs.
A centipede is an inchworm that has switched to the metric system.
A certain amount of cuteness shouldn't be allowed to exist
A certain amount of opposition is a help, not a hindrance. Kites rise against the wind, not with it
A certain amount of stupidity is necessary to make a good soldier
A certain moderator "who shall remain nameless" Has shunned the list.
A certain ruler worshipped Jesus in Matthew 9:18.
A certain user who shall remain nameless has shunned the rules!
A chain is no stronger than its weakest link
A chain of lynx; a peck of birds; a hoard of squirrels.
A chainsaw! Find some meat!
A champion is one who gets up when he can't. - Jack Dempsey
A champion is someone who gets up even when they can't.
A change in wardrobe wouldn't hurt. - Hercules to Hades
A change is as good as a .... how does the rest go ?
A change is coming . . . a great wind is going to blow. - Stephen King
A change of heart, will take a while. So for now, I love her gentleman style. - Indecent Obsession
A chapter in Clinton Tales: Rohdam and Gomorrah.
A chaque pied son soulier. - Montaigne - .!
A character in a book by Terry Pratchett called "Witches Abroad".
A character is going from embarrassment to a baby
A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn't act that way very often
A charter or deed of a thing not in being, is not valid
A chat has nine lives
A chat with you, and death loses its sting!
A chat with you, and death loses its sting! -- Blackadder
A cheap dominatrice offers bargain debasement
A cheap shot is a terrible thing to waste.
A cheapskate is someone who marries a prostitute for her money.
A check in hand is worth a hundred in the mail
A check will be a substitute for a father's love & guidance.[oops] WJC
A cheerful heart is good medicine. - Proverbs 17:22
A cheritable thesaurus of taglines
A chicken ain't nothin' but a bird.
A chicken coup with 4 doors is called a sedan.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
A chicken doesn't stop scratching just because the worms
A chicken in every pot
A chicken in every pot and a hard drive in every computer.
A chicken in every pot.
A chicken in trouble just walked around the faery woods.
A chicken is an egg's way of producing more eggs.
A chicken is an egg's way of reproducing itself.
A chicken is an egg's way to make more eggs
A chicken is how an egg makes another egg.
A chicken is just a low cholesteral egg!
A child arrived just the other day... - Harry Chapin
A child becomes an adult when he realises that he has a right not only to be right but also to be wrong. - Thomas Szasz
A child cannot be taught by anyone who despises him, and a child cannot afford to be fooled. - James Baldwin
A child educated only at school is an uneducated child
A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. - George Santayana
A child is a curly dimpled lunatic.
A child is a curly, dimpled lunatic. (Emerson)
A child is a curly, dimpled lunatic. --Ralph Waldo Emerson
A child is a curly-haired, dimpled lunatic.
A child is born in the world tonight underneath the full moonlight
A child is born with no concept of the tone of skin it's living in.
A child miseducated is a child lost. (John F. Kennedy)
A child of 5 could funderstand this! Fetch me a child of 5
A child of 5 could understand this! Bring me a child of 5!
A child of 5 could understand this! Fetch me a child
A child of 5 could understand this. Go find one, quick!
A child of 5 could understand this.Fetch me a child of 5.
A child of 5 years could do this! Fetch me a child of 5 years!
A child of five could do this. Fetch me a child of five.
A child of five could understand this! Fetch me a child of five.
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. - Groucho Marx
A child of the stars! -Doctor Zee
A child on the way? Isn't that a classic example of overachieving?
A child passes through your life and then disappears into an adult
A child prodigy knows not to @S with it
A child prodigy knows not to bother with it.
A child squeals real loud when picked up by the ears.
A child will not spill on a dirty floor.
A child will trust....until they find trust betrayed
A child's ability to endure likely stems from his ignorance of alternatives
A child's face can say a lot, especially the mouth part of the face
A child's middle name is so he can tell when he's REALLY in trouble.
A child's mind: Clean slate. Be careful what you write
A child. An old woman. Dozens. Hundreds. -- Troi
A chimpanzee and two trainees could run her -- Scotty
A chin butt! - Frank
A chocolate bar is a terrible thing to waste
A chocolate in the mouth is worth two on the dessert plate
A chocolate sundae! .. how did you know?! - D. Troi
A choice is always possible, even without any options.
A chronaton field? --La Forge
A chronic disposition to inquiry deprives domestic felines of vital qualities
A chrysanthemum by any other name would be easier to spell.
A chubby man with a white beard and a red suit will approach you soon
A chubby man with a white beard and a red suit will approach you soon. Avoid him. He's a Commie
A chunky Crow - Tom
A church debt is the devil's salary. Henry Ward Beecher
A church guard must mind his keys and pews.
A cigar is just a cigar.
A cinematic tranqualizer - Dr. Forrester on movie
A circle is a line that meets it's other end without ending.
A circle is a round straight line with a hole in the middle.
A circuit protected by a fast acting fuse will protect the fuse by blowing first
A circus sideshow has cunning stunts. A burlesque dance line
A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election
A citizen of America!07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I !pleH
A citizen-proper is not one by virtue of residence. - Aristotle
A city is a large community where people are lonesome together
A city is a large community where people are lonesome together -- Herbert Prochnow
A city the size of N.Y. could be infected within a few days - DS 1x08
A city without trees is not fit for a dog.
A civilized nation has full gun registration. - Adolph Hitler
A clarification from that moderator thing
A clarinet's not just a molehill on steroids
A clarinet's not just a pinch of wits?
A clash of doctrine is not a disaster - it is an opportunity
A classic case of man versus fate. Best of three falls. Ten round limit.
A classic is a book highly praised yet never read.
A classic is a book that is much praised, rarely read.
A classic is a book that is praised but not read
A classic is a book which people praise and never read.
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read. -- Mark Twain
A classic, something every body wants to have read but no one wants to read. - Mark Twain
A claw crashes with deafening impact!
A cleAN hardDIsk iS A sIgN of a cluTTEred dISkette box
A clean & dry set of BDU's are magnets for mud and rain.
A clean (and dry) set of BDU's is a magnet for mud and rain
A clean car is a clear sign of a sick mind
A clean desk = compulsive and/or bored.
A clean desk is a sign of a -sick- mind
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered mind
A clean desk is a sign of a new employee
A clean desk is a sign of a sick mind!!!!
A clean desk is a sign of an empty mind.
A clean desk is a sign of cluttered desk drawers.
A clean desk is a sign of corporate downsizing
A clean desk is a sign of of a cluttered desk drawer.
A clean desk is a sign of sick mind or a full garbage can.
A clean desk is a sure sign of a sick mind.
A clean desk is the sign of a cluttered desk drawer
A clean desk means you are compulsive and/or bored
A clean desk requires a large wastebasket.
A clean disk is a sign of no Windows
A clean disk is a sure sign of a sick mind!
A clean disk is a sure sign of a warped drive
A clean disk is the sign of a sick computer
A clean disk is the sign of a sick mind
A clean disk is the sign of a small mind.
A clean disk is the sign of a warped drive.
A clean house is a sign of a misspent life.
A clean house is the sign of a wasted life
A clean house it the sign of a misspent life.
A clean kitchen is the Sign of A Take Out House
A clean kitchen is the sign of a wasted life.
A clean limerick is a contradiction in terms.
A clean mind is a fantasy!
A clean mind is the sign of a sick desk.
A clean neat dest is a sign of a very sick mind.
A clean room is a sure sign of a broken computer.
A clean team is a mean team.
A clean tie attracts the soup of the day
A clean, neat desk is a sign of a sick mind.
A clean, neat, and orderly desk is a sign of a sick mind.
A clean, neat, and orderly work place is a sure sign of a sick mind
A clean, neat, desk is a sign of a sick mind.
A clean, safe environment..everyone's birthright
A clear case of Ipkissia Maskosis. I must remove your brain. - Neuman
A clear conscience begins with a clear memory. (Laurence J. Peter)
A clear conscience is a sign of a bad memory.
A clear conscience is actually a bad memory
A clear conscience is indicative of a faulty memory
A clear conscience is just the result of bad memory
A clear conscience is mearly the result of a bad memory.
A clear conscience is most often a sign of a bad memory.
A clear conscience is usually the result of bad memory.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
A clear conscience makes a good pillow.
A clear conscience makes taste good
A clear conscience usually means you have a bad memory, or are in denial
A clear vision of tomorrow comes only after a good long look at yesterday
A clever man commits no minor blunders. - Johann von Goethe
A clever man commits no minor blunders. Ä Goethe
A clever prophet makes sure of the event first
A clever tagline is a good excuse for posting a message.
A cliche is a bright new original thought with tenure
A click-click here, a click-click there, everywhere a double-click
A clique of castanet players.
A clitoris is a type of flower.
A clone and a Ferengi all decide to go bowling together
A clone is a clone and will always be a clone. (Some IBM %s)
A clone?! He is a clone?! - Worf
A close pointing finger and a power cable all look the same to Voles
A closed door is an attack on a cat's personal freedom
A closed mind and a closed room are both somewhat stuffy.
A closed mind doesn't need drugs. It is already wasted.
A closed mind gathers no facts.
A closed mind gathers no intelligence
A closed mind gathers no knowledge.
A closed mind gathers no thoughts.
A closed mind is a terrible waste of space
A closed mind is a wonderful thing to loose
A closed mind is a wonderful thing to make fun of.
A closed mind is an empty mind
A closed mind is as useful as a blind eye
A closed mouth catches no feet !
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
A closed mouth gathers no feet. Says nothing either!
A closed mouth gathers no feet...
A closed mouth gathers no flies.
A closed mouth gathers no foot
A closed mouth gathers no foot! Have a nice day!
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
A closed mouth gathers no judges
A closed mouth gathers no tongue
A closed mouth maintains a happy mind.
A closed mouth says nothing wrong!
A closed mouth says nothing wrong; a closed mind does nothing right.
A closed mouth.......gathers no feet!
A closet full of courteous anxieties is of dubious comfort
A clover leaf was lucky instead of confusing?
A clown is a poet in action.
A clown is a poet in action. -- Miller
A clown is my friend...he will not bite me and throw me in ze basement.
A clown will not bite me and lock me in the basement
A clown without a job is nobody's fool
A clue! A clue! A clue-hoo-hoo! - Tom excitedly
A cocktail party's a device for paying off obligations to people you don't want to invite for dinner
A code in my node? I must be a programmer
A coffee break for Sisyphus!
A coffee cup gets lighter the longer you hold it
A coin. Good. I will replicate one immediately. - Data
A coin. Very well. I shall replicate one immediately
A cold BUD and a CAMEL...ain't life grand!
A cold Diet Coke and another Camel.
A cold beer in one hand, a bottle of wine in the other.
A cold shower is more comfortable if you use warm water
A cold what? * Data
A cold wind blows on a windless day
A collection of taxes.
A collective derriere. How interesting.
A college degree does make you a teacher!
A college education shows a man how little other people know
A college professor is someone smart enough to get a Ph.D., but too crazy to make a living
A collision is a near miss.
A column about errors will contain errors. (Bill Gold)
A com is a com is a com, but Windows NT will not COME!
A combination of Michael J. Pollard, Yahoo Serious, and Buddha.
A comedian is a person who has a good memory for old jokes.
A cometary impact before breakfast may spoil the rest of your day
A comfortable place for a fight
A comfortable place for a fight - Mike on hayloft
A comfortable place for a fight-- Mike Nelson
A command of your own? I can swing that, too! - Kirk-2
A command-level officer? You mean, like you? - Nog
A commanding officer doesn't need brains, just a good loud voice.
A committe: a life form with 6 or more legs and no brain
A committee can make a decision dumber than its members
A committee for the disabled has six or more legs and no brain.
A committee has 6 or more legs and no brain.
A committee has six or more legs and no brain - Heinlein.
A committee has six or more legs and no brain.
A committee is 12 men doing the work of one
A committee is a beast with four hind legs. (John le Carr‚)
A committee is a cul de sac down which ideas are lured and then quietly strangled
A committee is a cul de sac to which ideas are lured and then quietly strangled. - John A. Lincoln
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours... - Milton Berle
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours. -- Milton Berle
A committee is a life form with 6 or more legs and no brains
A committee is a life form with many legs and no brain
A committee is a life form with six of more legs and no brain.
A committee is a life form with six or more legs and no brain. -- Lazarus Long, "Time Enough For Love"
A committee is a life form with six or more legs and no brain. L. Long
A committee is an animal with a hundred stomachs and no brains
A committee is an animal with at least six legs, and no brain. -- Heinlein
A committee is the only lifeform with 100 bellies and no brain.
A committee of one gets things done.
A committee of three gets things done if two don't show up
A committee should consist of three men, two of whom are absent. - Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree
A committee's real objective is not to reach a decision but to avoid it
A committee: a life form with 6 or more legs and no brain
A common malady is diarrhea of the mouth and constipation of the brain
A commune is where people join together to share their lack of wealth. -- R. Stallman
A communist has nothing...and wishes to share it with the world
A communist is a socialist without a sense of humour.
A communist is one who has nothing and wishes to share it with all.
A communist keyboard has no 'ESC' Key
A companion of fools shall be destroyed.
A companion of fools shall be destroyed. - Proverbs 13:20
A company is known by the company it employs
A company is known by the data it keeps
A company is known by the people it keeps.
A company without bosses is like a camel without waterskies
A compassionate Republican steps over the homeless, not on them.
A competent and reliable dishwasher never starves. (Heinlien)
A complete endorser of the Blue Wave Offline Mail System.
A completed Family History? I'd like to see THAT!
A complex man comes home and wonders about the universe's complexities
A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that worked
A compliment is something like a kiss through a veil. -- Victor Hugo
A component selected at random from a group having 99% reliability, will be a member of the 1% group
A compressed disk is a sign of a fragmented drive
A computer ... no wonder I couldn't change the channel!
A computer a day
A computer a day.....
A computer addict needs 26 hours in a day, all 8 days of the week
A computer cuts your work in half and gives you back the bloody ends.
A computer does exactly what it's told. This is not necessarily what you want
A computer does what you tell it to do, not what you want it to do.
A computer doesn't do anything smart. It does something stupid fast.
A computer expert is someone who can make a mistake and not get mad at the computer.
A computer has an IQ of zero. The operator's IQ is quest
A computer has an IQ of zero. The operator's IQ is quest
A computer is a large hole in which you throw your money
A computer is a terrible thing to waste
A computer is a typewriter with an attitude
A computer isn't expensive IF you pay enough for it.
A computer makes as many mistakes in one second as three men working for thirty years straight
A computer never forgets your birthday
A computer never forgives or forgets.
A computer program does what you tell it to do, not what you want it
A computer program is used to turn data into error messages
A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren't broken.
A computer user will tell you everything you ask about and nothing more
A computer with Windows is a very expensive Etch-a-Sketch
A computer without COBOL and Fortran is like a piece of chocolate cake without ketchup and mustard
A computer without FORTRAN is like a fish without a bicycle
A computer without Windows is like a fish w/o a bicycle
A computer without software just decorates your desk.
A computer won't even talk about marriage
A computer won't fall in love with you just because you have sex.
A computer won't give it's virus to you.
A computer's attention span is as big as it's upper memory block
A computer's attention span is as long as it's power cord
A computer's attention span is only as long as its extension cord.
A computer's attention span is only as long as its power cord
A computer's got to do what a computer's got to do. - Holly
A computer, a modem, a phone line... what else do you need?
A computer, to print out a fact, will divide, multiply, and subtract
A computer? No wonder I couldn't change the channel!
A concealed fault is equal to a deceit
A concentrated phaser blast makes the best Universal Translator.
A concept is stronger than a fact. - Charlotte Perkins Gilman
A conclusion = the place where you got tired of thinking
A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking.
A conclusion is what you reach when you get tired of thinking.
A conclusion is where somebody got tired of thinking.
A conclusion is where you get tired of thinking.
A conclusion simply means they got tired of thinking.
A concrete example is very hard to carry around.
A condom ? Yes, I wear one all the time....just in case
A condom is a large apartment complex.
A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done. -- Fred Allen
A conference is no match for natural stupidity
A conference with the IRS is a taxing proposition.
A confession made in court is of greater effect than any proof
A confident manner is important, as computers can sense this! :-)
A confident manner is important; computers can sense fear.
A confident manner is vital - computers can sense this
A confirmation is null where the preceding gift is invalid
A confirmed cookie eater!
A confrontation like this was inevitable. - Sisko
A congressman and a congresswoman go to lunch. Who pays?
A congressman thinks twice before saying nothing.
A conscience does not prevent sin. It only prevents you from enjoying
A conscience hurts when everything else feels good
A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good
A conscience is what hurts when everything else feels good.
A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually. - Abba Eban
A consequence ought not to be drawn from another consequence
A conservative gov't is an organized hypocrisy--Disraeli
A conservative government is an organized hypocrasy.
A conservative government is an organized hypocrisy. - Benjamin Disraeli
A conservative is Society's version of a computer virus.
A conservative is a liberal who's been mugged (usually by
A conservative is a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is a conservative who's been arrested."
A conservative is a liberal whose kid has been mugged by the NEA.
A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time
A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time. -- Alfred E. Wiggam
A conservative is a man who is too cowardly to fight and too fat to run. -- Elbert Hubbard
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who has never learned to walk. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
A conservative is a person who lives in a past that never existed.
A conservative is a worshiper of dead radicals.
A conservative is one who is too cowardly to fight and to
A conservative is one who is too cowardly to fight and too fat to run.
A conservative's generosity is limited to self.
A consistent man believes in destiny, a capricious man in chance. - Benjamin Disraeli
A conspiracy of silence speaks louder than words.
A constant note of triumph dislocates man so it seems
A constipated german: Farfrompoopin
A consultant is a hooker with a Ph.D.
A consultant is a person who borrows your watch, tells you what time it is, pockets the watch, and sends you a bill for it
A consultant is an executive who can't find a job
A consultant is an ordinary person a long way from home
A consultant may be defined as an unemployed practitioner
A contemporaneous exposition is the best and most powerful in the law
A content mind is both crown and kingdom. (Greene)
A contented man can enjoy the scenery along the detour
A contented man is always rich
A contented man is one who enjoys the scenery along the detour.
A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.
A continuously immaculate house is the sign of a misspent life.
A contra-bassoon is like a bassoon, only more so.
A contract cannot arise out of an act radically wrong and illegal
A contract is a contract...but only to another Fernegi. -- FRA #17
A contradiction in terms: >>User Friendly<<
A contradiction in terms: Military Intelligence.
A contradiction in terms: User Friendly.
A contradiction of terms-The Best of Rush Limbaugh
A convenient buzzward for Phoenix? "Cosmic" fits the bill nicely.
A conversation about computers is a DISKussion
A conversation begins with the first word
A converted cannibal eats only fishermen on Friday
A converted cannibal is one who, on Friday, eats only fishermen
A convict's mind is terrible thing to waste, (money on, that is)
A cook is the meal's way of creating more meals
A cookie a day keeps the doctor away!
A cool ball gathers no gutters - Homer Simpson
A cop asks for your identification, and you hand him your
A copy of Windows 3.1 and 4x4 MB of SIMMs, please
A copy of the universe is not what is required of art; one of the damned things is ample. -- Rebecca West
A corpse in the bedroom will spoil the Open House
A corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. - Matthew 7:17
A cosmos without @TO@- it scarcely bears thinking about!
A cosmos without The Doctor scarcely bears thinking about.
A cosmos without you - it scarcely bears thinking about!
A couch is as good as a chair
A counterfeiter is a man who wants money bad.
A country boy can survive. -- Bocephus
A country can be judged by the quality of its proverbs. - German Proverb
A country man between two lawyers is like a tunafish between two cats.
A country that ignores history has no future.
A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Ben Franklin
A coup that is known in advance is a coup that does not take place
A couple bushels shy of a full crop
A couple keys short of a concert piano.
A couple of Pentiums is all you need... to do a good grilled steak
A couple of cans short of a six-pack.
A couple of dots missing on the dice
A couple of dots short of a tagline.
A couple of fries short of a Happy Meal.
A couple of kids tried using pickles instead of paddles for a Ping-Pong game. They had the volley of the Dills
A couple of light years can't keep friends apart * Wesley
A couple of months in the lab can often save a couple of hours in the library
A couple of months in the laboratory can frequently save
A couple of numbers missing on the clock
A couple of open splices
A couple of revisions behind.
A couple of spots short of a set of dominos
A couple of ticks past the noon whistle.
A couple of volts below threshold.
A couple random tagline for your viewing pleasure:
A couple sandwiches short of a picnic.
A couple sharps short of B Major.
A couple went to see mystery and horror movies. They loved each shudder
A couplet short of a sonnet.
A courageous foe is better than a cowardly friend.
A cousin a day keeps boredom away.
A cow eats without a knife.
A cow stepped on his head.
A cow with no legs = ground beef
A coward dies a thousand deaths
A coward dies a thousand deaths but a brave man dies but one.
A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
A coward is incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave. Mahatma Gandhi
A coward is incapable of showing love, it's the prerogative of the brave
A coward is someone who thinks with his legs in an emergency
A coward mistakes oppression for peace.
A coward sweats in water - Ethiopia
A coward: one who thinks with his legs
A cowardly cur barks more fiercely than its bite.
A cowboy might drive a Mustang.
A cowchip is paradise to a fly!
A cranck with armor, will never harm'er.
A cranial hemorrhoid will cause a stroke...what's your excuse?
A crank in armor will never harm her.
A crank is a little thing that makes revolutions
A crank with armor will never harm her
A crappie is not a sunfish found in a toilet.
A crash of Windows taglines.
A crate of UZI's, a carton of whiskey... let's go to Disney!
A crate of UZI's, a carton of whiskey...let's party!
A crate of UZI's, a carton of whiskey...lets go to Disneyland!
A craving for Tofu and Avacados? "Am I pregnant?"
A creative Mind is seldom tidy
A creature that pretended to be a man and called itself Flagg
A crew member drinks - drink!
A crew member is in casual clothes - drink!
A criminal can be an interesting thing to waste
A criminal lawyer - is there any other kind?
A crises is when you CAN'T say let's forget about the whole thing!
A crisis is when you can"t say, "Let"s just forget the whole thing." -- Ferguson
A crisis is when you can't say "Let's forget about it."
A crisis is when you can't say "Let's forget the whole thing."
A critic is a bunch of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste.
A critic is a bundle of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste. -- Whitney Balliett
A critic is a legless man who teaches running
A critic is a man who knows the way, but can't drive the car
A critic is a man who knows the way, but can't drive the car. - Kenneth Tynan
A critic is a man who leaves no turn unstoned.
A critic is one who knows the way but can't run the boat.
A critic knows the way but can't drive the vehicle.
A crooked stick can hit a pretty good lick.
A cross between Police Gazette and Mad Magazine. <Cole>
A cross between Rambo and Mary Poppins. -- Peter Fenn on George Bush
A cross between a Vulcan and a tribble: Fuzzy Logic.
A cross between a giant anteater & the devil dog - Tom
A cross? Oy, vey, have YOU got the wrong vampire!
A crow perched on a telephone wire, making a long distance caw.
A crow that flies in heaven's sweetest air. - Shakespeare
A crowd is a mob with no leader.
A crowd of people stood and stared.
A crowd of people stood and stared. Ä Beatles
A crowded elevator always smells different to a midget
A crowded elevator smells different to short people
A crucifix? Oi vey, hav eyou got the wrong vampire.
A crude, but effective ruse.
A cruel story runs on wheels, and every hand oils the wheels as they run. - Ouida
A crummy excuse beats no excuse
A crunchy frog a day keeps the doctor away
A crunchy frog a day keeps the doctor away. Ä Monty Python
A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety
A crystal plate mail will not rust.
A cube is an extended square
A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door
A cubit? Let me see, I used to know what a cubit was
A cucumber can always wait until you get home.
A cucumber doesn't care if you always spend the holidays with your family
A cucumber doesn't care if you are a virgin.
A cucumber doesn't have hands when it's desperate
A cucumber isn't allergic to your cat.
A cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety.
A cucumber never wants to do it in unusual places.
A cucumber never wants to do it while your nails are wet.
A cucumber never wants to get it on when your nails are wet
A cucumber will always respect you in the morning.
A cucumber will never flush the toilet when you are in the shower
A cucumber will never give you a hickey
A cucumber will never leave the toilet seat up
A cucumber will never leave you before you want them to
A cucumber won't ask "Am I the first?"
A cucumber won't ask, How was it?
A cucumber won't care what time of the month it is
A cucumber won't come home late, stinking of beer
A cucumber won't insist the little cukes be raised catholic, jewish, or orthodox vegetarian
A cucumber won't leave you for a cheerleader or an ex-nun
A cucumber won't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy."
A cucumber won't shatter if you drop it on the ground
A cucumber won't speculate about your next lover
A cucumber won't take you to a disco and dump you for a flashy blonde.
A cucumber won't tell you that he's outgrown you intellectually
A cucumber won't tell you that size doesn't count.
A cult is a religion whose leader isn't dead yet
A cult is a religion with no political power
A cult is a religion with no political power -Thomas Wolfe
A cult is a religion with no political power.
A cult is any religion without political power.
A cult is someone ELSE's religion
A cult that places dogma above fact becomes a religion
A cultist---one who voted for the Clintons.
A culture that worships John Candy -Crow on Bhudda statue
A cumcumber doesn't have hands when it's desperate
A cunning linguist is good with his tongue!
A cup and saucer short of a full place setting
A cup of SPLIT-PEA ISADORA SOUP? - Mike on deli menu
A cup of `SPLIT-PEA ISADORA SOUP'?
A cup of `SPLIT-PEA ISADORA SOUP'? -- Mike Nelson
A cup of millipede juice, hold the shells. -- Quark
A cup of tea is nicer than sex, but it scalds your willy!!
A cure for apathy? Why @S?
A cure for apathy? Why bother?
A curious and captious interpretation in the law is to be reproved
A curved line is the loveliest distance between 2 points
A custom more honored in the breach than the observance.
A custom ought to be certain
A cute Blonde with a gun.. can go anywhere.. - Janier
A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything, and the value of nothing. - Oscar Wilde
A cynic is a man who looks around for a coffin when he smells flowers
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. - H. L. Mencken
A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with a stolen lantern
A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with a stolen lantern. -- Edgar A. Shoaff
A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with stolen lantern.
A cynic is a person who refuses to share your illusions
A cynic is an idealist who has finally learned the truth.
A cynic is an optimist that got a face full of reality.
A cynic is man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
A cynic is one who stops to smell the flowers, then looks for a coffin
A cynic is only a frustrated optimist
A cynic knows the price of everything & value of nothing
A cynic laughs at anything as long as it isn't funny
A cynic looks both ways before crossing a one-way street
A cynic searchers for an honest man using a stolen lantern
A cynic searches 4 an honest man,with a stolen lantern.
A cynic smells flowers and looks for a casket.
A cynic smells flowers and looks for the funeral
A cynic smells the flowers & looks for the casket!
A cynic smells the flowers and looks for the coffin
A cynic smells the flowers and then looks for the casket
A cynic's work is never done.
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